I must be stupid – TMI Post

26 Nov

You have been forewarned… this is a TMI post regarding cervical mucus.


While I understand what Egg Whites look like or are supposed to feel like, I AM JUST NOT ABLE TO TRANSFER MY BAKING KNOWLEDGE TO MY TTC KNOWLEDGE.

egg whites (healthylogica.blogspot.com)

The last few days I have had discharge – Such a yucky word – like little mucus balls, sorry TMI, which I think is awesome because I think Acupuncture is making my baby making organs really WURK, like GIRL YOU BETTER WURK, WORK. I would classify it as creamy not watery, stretchy, transparent globs. Please know that this type of discharge is kinda of normal for me, I get it every three or four months (of course, before I was charting was the last time I got it) and its not accompanied by itching or burning, this is not a yeast infection or UTI or anything like that. Its just my body being my body and hopefully fertile.


So I dont know if that is classified as… On Fertility Friend – its Yes, all of the above. So what do I put?



My temperatures are pretty consistent with last month leading up to ovulation and my OPKs are getting darker by the day so I expect ovulation to occur probably Friday or Saturday, maybe earlier if my cycle is going back to a 33/34 day window. And I want Sexy time with Tyler… Like randomly so I know my body is saying “This is go time”


I think I am going to Take off on Friday… Why?  Because Ty is coming to Acupuncture with me on Friday. Isn’t that awesome? I am super excited. Anyway, Since I think I should be Fertile around that point I dont think I should be doing it, rushing to work, letting gravity pull all those swimmer down in my panties during the decaf coffee break and then rushing home to do it again. Even though we have alot going on in the house, I think I should follow Scotts advice and rest after sex. I mean who am I kidding? I fall right asleep if able to so resting is not an issue for me.  And no, I do not like to cuddle afterwards.


Ty did mention, “Should you boost up your ass for a better incline afterwards?” I think I will do that again even though its not proven to do anything more or less so what the hell, why not.


I guess I have a hard time with my CM though….  Am I the only one?


Look at Symptom number #14. I.AM.A.TWELVE.YEAR.OLD.BOY 🙂


Oh, another gem from Ty was yesterday before we went to his parents house. I used my curling wand to do something different with my hair which came out like I electrocuted myself  and then brushed my hair so it was frizzy… but as I am waiting for Ty to get ready he goes “Sexy Mama… look at your hair it says ‘Im sexy and about to be fertile'”. Yes, Ladies and Gents, that is my husband. Welcome to our world. And doesnt the curling wand look like a dildo? It totally does.





22 Responses to “I must be stupid – TMI Post”

  1. Bear November 26, 2012 at 11:52 am #

    Visiting from ICLW. I could never figure out how to compare my CM to eggs either. And everything I read just made me more confused.

    • maretilton November 26, 2012 at 12:19 pm #

      Dont ever Google for Images for CM… OH MY GOD

  2. kristenp06 November 26, 2012 at 11:57 am #

    Stick a pillow under your ass! They make fertility pillows. I have a pillow every time! Also if you can lay on you back for 10 minutes, as still as possiblen it helps. My RE has me do that after artificial insemination. Give that a whirl 🙂

    • maretilton November 26, 2012 at 12:20 pm #

      Thanks! I have also been using a softcup afterwards 🙂

  3. SM November 26, 2012 at 12:19 pm #

    Dildo iron! That is awesome! I have a hard time with mucus too. Mainly because splooj looks like egg whites too occasionally. Add in a little mid-cycle spotting and I’m all sorts of confused.

    • maretilton November 26, 2012 at 12:22 pm #

      YEAH I KNOW! Trying to figure out CM after Sex… PLEASE, that does not happen in our world. Its all mixed together and just a soupy mess.

      I am starting to think CM is like the lock ness monster… some see it… many dont.

  4. Mrs. Wuestewald November 26, 2012 at 1:18 pm #

    So I had the same discharge out of the blue a few cycles, and was like WTF I have a yeast infect with no itch. Naturally I called the dr office because I had my first iui the next day. Foolish I felt when she said I am probably ovulating and it’s normal. Here I thought cm egg white was way different, but I have never seen it since. Love your curling iron, does look like a FUN dildo lol.

    • maretilton November 26, 2012 at 1:59 pm #

      When I first bought the iron, I left it out in the bathroom and Ty was like “My Parents are coming over, put that away”. I was like, dude, curling iron, Re-lax.

      🙂 So Good to know that I am not the only one that is wondering what the hell egg white CM should be or shouldnt be. What every you do, dont google it. EVER. Unless you want to rip your eyes out

  5. Kathryn November 26, 2012 at 8:20 pm #

    Here’s some TMI to go with your TMI. I specifically remember the first time I ever saw EWCM. Dec 2011. I had been off the pill for a year. I remember that month because I was doing weight watchers and losing weight, and exercising, and I had my first 29 day cycle. One morning, I went to the bathroom and when I stood up and wiped, something PLOPPED on the floor.It reminded me of one of those clear stick on gel toilet bowl cleaner thingies (but smaller). I scraped it off the floor with my finger, it was clear and jelly like and I was so confused. Then, I understood, EWCM!
    I don’t think I experienced that again until the summer when I started acupuncture and cut out caffeine and started taking some Chinese herbs. The mucus got a little more watery/stretchy, less jelly like, and it was clear as day in August when I went to wipe, it was long and stringy and clear and stretchy… and so we did it that day, and it resulted in the pregnancy.
    SO, my conclusion, your body is gearing up. It might be EWCM! And drink tons of water! Keep up with the acupuncture! Apparently that EWCM thing is vital for conceiving so the more copious it is the better. Did you ever look into Guaifenesin to help create more mucus? Some people swear by it.

    • maretilton November 26, 2012 at 8:51 pm #

      Not Tmi at all! I’m glad I’m not the only one with the globs!!!

      I tried mucinex the second month but I wasn’t too keen on putting medication into my body so stopped after that month and started with the acupuncture!!!

      Thanks for giving me hope!

  6. Stephanie November 26, 2012 at 9:09 pm #

    If it stretches more than an inch multiple times, it’s definitely EWCF.

  7. alie November 26, 2012 at 10:12 pm #

    I voted for option #4!!! I gave up on Fertility Friend after about a month and a half of charting. Sooo not for me! ha 🙂

  8. fromheretomotherhood November 27, 2012 at 11:13 am #

    Haha the curling wand makes me thing of the anal dildos I’ve seen at sex toy parties.

    I have very little to no CM. At least not ewcm. I used to have it, but not really anymore. The only time I seem to get it is JUST before I start my period (apparently due to an estrogen surge at that time). It’s definitely a concern I have, especially if the RE puts me on clomid considering that it’s known to dry you out.

    • maretilton November 27, 2012 at 12:52 pm #

      Have you tried preseed or anything? I was contemplating it but am holding off until next cycle

      • fromheretomotherhood November 27, 2012 at 1:07 pm #

        Yeah we use it. I just worry that it’s not enough (i.e., if your body isn’t producing the right stuff it’s a sign of something more). We have used preseed since almost the very beginning once I learned that other lube is bad. At first I hoped it would be the magic trick. It’s not, but it certainly helps with BD when you tend to be dry like me (I think it has something to do with my antidepressants, which coincides with when I started needing lube in the first place and some do cause less cm).

      • maretilton November 27, 2012 at 1:44 pm #

        I do remember when I was on antidepressants that I was dry as well and had no drive what so ever. I was a sex camel for about a year, I’m sure the hubby hated that.

        Hopefully the RE can pin point an easy to solve issue for you.

  9. erika November 27, 2012 at 6:20 pm #

    If it is stretchy, it’s definitely EW:) Happy sexy times! I hope this cycle it is!
    If you can mix a bit of humor into this whole TTC/IF game – that could be a lifesaver. I have been ever grateful to my DH, who would make the worst jokes even in the thick of our struggles and crack me up. ICLW #33

  10. christine November 27, 2012 at 8:44 pm #

    How confusing! And hilarious. And I totally agree with other posters that after sex, it’s SOOO hard to tell what is what!! Thanks for the good laugh!

    ICLW #38

  11. A Passage to Baby November 27, 2012 at 10:15 pm #

    HAHAHAHA. How could I not respond to the post that has a F-bomb in it’s poll and a dildo curling iron. HAHAHAHHAHHA. Awesomesauce.

  12. Juno December 3, 2012 at 10:34 pm #

    So it’s totally showing my chart when I look at yours. How freaking bizarro.

    • maretilton December 3, 2012 at 10:43 pm #

      I think there is a cookies/cache issue with fertility friend. My second to last post has a copied in paint chart that may show up. It’s so odd isn’t it!!?!

      • Juno December 4, 2012 at 9:58 pm #

        ahhhh. You’re prob right, I a=have had it happen on FF when I look at others charts but never on a different website. I guess it’s not everyday though that we’re on a page that has another ff chart unless it’s ff lol.

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