October is National Pregnancy and Loss Awareness Month

16 Oct

Yesterday at 7pm people lit candles all over the world in remembrance of babies that were lost. I was too caught up with a filing deadline at work and the loss of my Mom’s cat (Its a bad year for kitties, I don’t know why) to remember to post anything about this very important month/day.


“When a child loses his parent, they are called an orphan. When a spouse loses her or his partner, they are called a widow or widower. When parents lose their child, there isn’t a word to describe them.”


Ronald Reagan said the above when he declared October to be the national month way back in October of 1988. I think the quote is very fitting. There are no words to describe a parent losing a child. You always believe that your child will out live you.


Ty and I struggled with deciding on whether on not to remember the baby we lost back in 2010. We decided to remember in our hearts but not by a physical object. Our reasoning was that it was so early on in the pregnancy and only a couple of weeks into us knowing we had a baby on the way. Our decision, was just that, ours.


I doubt there is a day that I don’t think about what could have been. This time in 2010, I was most likely waiting for a blood test to confirm that the shots of Methotrexate worked and that my HCG levels were declining.


I wonder that if things were okay and the pregnancy lasted, if Ty and I would be trying for number 2 now…. if we would have gotten married in May or sooner or maybe waited. I wonder alot of what ifs but I know I am not alone. So many women out there go through loss… whether it is in the first trimester to the first year and beyond…


As I have said before, I want people to be more open and discuss trying to conceive and pregnancy loss. The world loves a pregnant women… but does not know how to love her when the baby does not make it and that’s when she needs it the most.


I am going to continue to light a candle every day in October at 7:00pm to remember our baby, your baby and every baby that is an angel now. Also, at 7:00pm, I am going to say what I am grateful for that day and continue to look towards the future while learning and remembering the past.




One Response to “October is National Pregnancy and Loss Awareness Month”

  1. Ovarian Cyst October 26, 2012 at 10:38 pm #

    I could not refrain from commenting. Exceptionally well written!

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