How I got a Subscription to Cosmo

27 Sep

Our household is overloaded with magazines. Why? Because they are an awesome Christmas present / Stocking Stuffer… Currently we get

 

  • This old house
  • Family Handy man (Funny, I wrote Hamily Fandy Nam first, isn’t that odd, Brain must not be firing right??!?!)
  • Consumer Reports
  • Cooks (The Americas Test Kitchen one)
  • Redbook
  • Fitness (Whomever got me that subscription, you are awesome and still unnamed!)
  • Marie Claire
  • Vogue (NO Idea how I got this one and its HORRIBLE – All Ads, although one story was actually disturbing, it’s this one, prepared to get angryhttp://jezebel.com/5895602/mom-puts-7+year+old-on-a-diet-in-the-worst-vogue-article-ever)
  • Pop Sci
  • Pop Mechanics
  • Car and Driver

Now I can add Cosmo to the list. Why is that? Because Tyler bought me a subscription on the spot after using a technique I found in their lovely 18 new things to try in bed section, or maybe it was 12 ways to make your lover scream or 5 Things you never tried but should or 42 ways to please a man or 63 Exciting Bedroom Tricks. You know, one of those stories. And as a side notes, with this subscription I do plan to track if any of the tips are recycle in various other editions Because there cannot be THAT many sex tips.

 

Anyway, one day I was bored and decided that the Cosmo mag looked good while checking out at the grocery store. It had my Girl Lucy Hale on the cover from Pretty Little Liars… If you don’t know that show / Books you need to. ADDICTING. Anyway so I pick it up and read it on the couch when I got home. One of the tips in the endless number of fluff stories was to lightly  scratch/Lightly drag your fingers down in the inside of your mans legs during sexy time. I thought okay. I never tried that, logistics may be a little hard for me but I can figure out how to scratch Ty’s legs. So later – I tried it – Holy Shit it was like amazing for Tyler.

 

Mind.

 

Blown.

He was stunned and very happy. Afterwards we were having coffee and I said “So you liked that” and he’s like “oh my gosh yes”… I told him I learned it in Cosmo and he’s like I am getting you a subscription ASAP. Mind you, about five minutes before Tyler slammed down the Cosmo and asked “How do you women read this shit?!??! It’s absolutely words with no meaning and a million ads”.

 

Mind.

 

Changed.

 

So now I am receiving Cosmo. Now do I think it’s the best magazine? No. No way in hell… But its good brain candy for rainy days or days where Ty is watching “Breaking Bad” (too violent and gritty for me… makes me so depressed).

 

Have you ever found something in a magazine that just totally changed the game in bed with your partner?

 

Post Script

Bath Time – Changed forever because of 50 Shades
🙂 Although our tub is not that big and often we have to strategically position or legs as not to accidently toe the other persons privates, we make it work.

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4 Responses to “How I got a Subscription to Cosmo”

  1. fromheretomotherhood September 27, 2012 at 2:28 pm #

    I was an avid cosmo reader in my teens and even though I was probably the least experienced of my friends, they always came to me for advice. And my high school boyfriend swore that Cosmo had taught me well 😉 And for the record, they recycle A LOT of their tips. I don’t know any tips about the taint/choda/perineum I have read and how many times every guy I know refutes that idea.

    • maretilton September 27, 2012 at 2:43 pm #

      I had a girl in college that roomed with me and she SWORE that every guy liked a finger up their bums. One night she fooled around with a friend and the next day, the poor guy was violated basically. I NEVER tried anything out of the ordinary after hearing about that. I thought alittle tickle tickle couldnt be so bad and low and behold it works.

      Good to know on the recycling! that will save me from getting mad at the magazine.

      Funny thing is I used to read it when I was younger as well – WHAT WAS OUR PARENTS THINKING!!! Although, Redbook is slightly more slutty, surprisingly!

      • fromheretomotherhood September 27, 2012 at 3:15 pm #

        Interesting, never knew anything about Redbook’s kinky side. My mom was appalled by the fact that I also read British Cosmo. Those Europeans aren’t as squeamish about sex as North Americans are, so it was extra raunchy. Somehow my mom’s dismay never turned into banning me from reading them. I was pretty headstrong. I’m sure she knew it would never work and she trusted me to be smart about my smutty self-education.

  2. fromheretomotherhood September 27, 2012 at 2:28 pm #

    typo: I don’t know how many tips about the taint . . .

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