Getting Grumpy and Tired Again

25 Sep

That time of the month people! Its almost D-Day for my period (October 1st) and the count down starts. Of Course, Tyler thinks I am stressing but I am actually less stressed than I was last month. But that is still pretty high on the stress scale considered last month I was alittle Manic.

Per Countdowntopregnancy.com… If I am going to get pregnant this month, I would be implanting on Wednesday of this week (or at least that is the most common day based on my cycle). So… I will be waiting to see if there is a present in my panties (does that sound icky) on that day by way of spotting and then I will wait til Probably Friday to start testing.
Ty last night was like “none of this peeing on a stick every morning and night until you get your period, if you get your period this month, stop stressing”. And of course I was like I just want to start crying because it is such a different emotional experience each month between him and I.

While I can understand tys position, I want to give him the finger.

Then this morning my dang Basal Thermometer didnt want to work. Since I discovered that I did not need to stick that thing in my ass, I bought one and it Arrived on Friday. I have been testing at 5:52am every morning (Yes, ladies and gentleman I woke up on Saturday and Sunday at 5:52am to be consistent, go me!) and recording it happily in my little period tracker. This morning though all the thing would do is turn on, beep once and then turn off. I tried for about 5 minutes and then gave up. I think I beeped the shit out of Tyler as he was still trying to sleep but whatever (there was my middle finger from last night revenge). I looked at the directions, no help… decided to try one more time and it worked! Did some more beeping for about a minute and then gave my me temperature.

So all that combined is making me feel sad. Why sad? I dont know. I dont feel like it is going to happen this month but at least I know I did ovulate (cramps, hello! and ovulation kit, hello darker blue line) but I just dont feel it. I try to remember what it felt like back in 2010 and its vague. I remember getting a cold in the end of August so I felt awful then I was too stressed to remember my own name in the beginning of September and then spotted for three days and then major boobie hurtage a week or two later and then positive pregnancy test second to last week of September… Then gone.

I never thought days could go by so slow but time as a whole goes by so fast (Meaning, I am going to go nuts waiting for a few more days but how the hell is it almost October!).

I have put both another round of OPKs in my cart on Amazon and now I am tempted to buy a first response as well. Can anyone speed up time for me? I would love to know if this month is it or not. If it is not, oh well, lets try again next month.

Also as a side, I have been having  crazy dreams that are really hard for me to figure out if they really happened or if I dreamt them because I am that confused. Most of them center around finding out another person is pregnant on Facebook. Then I have to search their timeline to figure out if they really are pregnant or if I dreamt it. I really wish those would stop!

I did splurge this weekend. I had two glasses of red wine on Saturday. I know I know… I should have but it was over dinner and I had already decided that I was going to have one glass… it turned into two and then I went back to my seltzer.

I am feel blah today – seems like I always do this time of the month. Also the weather here is NOT helping.

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